Title: Wrath of the Titans

Cast: Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, Ralph Fiennes

What do you get when you add in an underdeveloped, grade-school understanding of Greek mythos, worthless 3-D and a curly mullet that would make just about every seminal 80’s action star blush? You get Wrath of the Titans. Overblown and completely incompetent, it actually manages to one-up the original in terms of goofy CGI and nonsense and incoherence in terms of plot. For a good fifteen minutes, it’s somehow not as cloying and loud as it proves to be beyond that fifteen minute mark. This is a movie aimed at children, although I’m sure adults need their fair share of mindless entertainment. Even then, though, I’m also 100% positive that even those just looking for silly Hollywood entertainment will probably need a little more than Wrath of the Titans can offer up. It may seem like gross hyperbole, but I promise you, it’s not: it’s really, really bad. But in all likelihood those of you reading this review will have already assumed that, so my review may simply be moot. Regardless, it’s a movie to be reviewed.

Granted, I have not seen the first movie, but I have a feeling I knew what to expect before entering the sequel. Within the first few moments, most of the material and story are covered–Perseus’ (played by Sam Worthington) defeat of the Kraken and so on and so forth. I also should state beforehand that I refused to pay for the 3-D, seeing as if the movie can’t be entertaining on a “2-D” level, then I doubt anything else will improve its quality. Zeus, who also appeared in the original, still played by Liam Neeson, shows up pretty quickly informing Perseus that his help is needed. Ares (Edgar Ramirez) and Hades (Ralph Fiennes) are looking to release the old god, Kronos. War-weary, Perseus seeks to live out his days alone with his son. Unfortunately nightmares are haunting him and Zeus is kidnapped by Hades and Ares, forcing him to act.

Let’s be honest here. Concentrating on the story seems almost pointless, so naturally, the action would have to be the primary talking point. Sadly enough, Wrath of the Titans even fails in that regard. The action is largely incoherent and incredibly crudely developed. There’s no flow, nor is there any sense of real threat or drama in the midst of this utter chaos. Like any good quality action film, the action always feels visceral, life- like and in-your-face. Wrath of the Titans is distant and dull. Sam Worthington, who is know becoming more of an everyday figure in action movies, plays Perseus with one note throughout the entire film. It isn’t just his acting, albeit, but director Jonathan Liebesman’s inability to build Perseus a backbone and personality of his own, rather than using the manufactured archetype of a war-weary soldier who’s forced back into battle.

There were many missed opportunities for Liebesman to help resurrect this disaster of a film. Perseus’ brother, Ares, is tempted towards setting Kronos free. One would think there would be some intensely dramatic sequences between the two brothers–you’d be wrong. Why wasn’t this dealt with? And why was Zeus’ relationship with Hades developed more? It probably doesn’t matter, to be honest. Saying more might not be worth it. Director Jonathan Liebesman didn’t find any of this material interesting, clearly, or else it might have turned out significantly better than this mess. Greek mythology is detailed, interesting and engagining–this was none of the above.

Story: F

Overall: F